my tombstone is an S.O.S.

i wish i didn't have
so much memory
for all of this pain
to steal away from me

so i have made a bed
bitterly, on a sinking ship
now i lay wide awake
as the water overtakes me

there is no heart
no voice or care within me
just all this wreckage
i cannot throw overbroard

i am the immovable
the despondant and silent
iron-willed lead anchor
that pulls myself downward

for if all i can know is grief
from a stark horizon
of sunless, joyless overcast
then let the waves take me

because i do not want
to remember anymore
everything that this pain
has stolen away from me

you have one new text message

i have seen the end.
it is not here,
but it is the home
we've never had here.